Major Shaky McFumblefingers

Luke 15:1-10

Now all the tax collectors and sinners were coming near to listen to Jesus.  And the Pharisees and the scribes were grumbling and saying, “This fellow welcomes sinners and eats with them.”

So he told them this parable: “Which one of you, having a hundred sheep and losing one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the wilderness and go after the one that is lost until he finds it?  And when he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders and rejoices.  And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and neighbors, saying to them, ‘Rejoice with me, for I have found my lost sheep.’  Just so, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance.

“Or what woman having ten silver coins, if she loses one of them, does not light a lamp, sweep the house, and search carefully until she finds it?  And when she has found it, she calls together her friends and neighbors, saying, ‘Rejoice with me, for I have found the coin that I had lost.’  Just so, I tell you, there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”

This lesson highlights two ways to get lost.  Neither recommended and yet both universal and unavoidable.  The first is like a sheep.  Head down, eat some grass, spot the next tuft, move, munch, repeat until one day you look up, have no idea where you are, and discover… you’re lost.  The other way we get lost is to be suddenly and unceremoniously dropped by life right on our heads… or on our tails… like a coin.  In one sudden and painful crash, sometimes followed by a brief or extended, wobbling roll… we find ourselves concussed and wedged in some unexpected, unknown, and very undesirable spot.  Head spinning.  Lost.  

I see you all nodding.  We’ve all wandered off like sheep.  We’ve all been dropped on our heads by life, like a coin.  We’ve all been lost.  Many of us feel lost right now!  So why do we pretend for the world that we are not?  Why do we, like the Pharisees and the Scribes in this story, not admit to wandering off inadvertently or that life has dropped us on our head and we feel like we’ve rolled into some deep, dark, life-crisis crevasse?  Why is it, that when we are asked, “how are you doing”, we automatically respond with, “Oh, I’m Okay… I’m fine… I’m hangin’ in there… doin’ good” or some other culturally appropriate BS when the truth is… I’m LOST! 

Jesus knew being lost was not just a “tax collector” thing or a “sinner” thing… it was then, and is now, an every human being thing!  Every single solitary one of us wanders off and gets lost… not just once in a while… but all the dang time!  Every single one of us goes from being just fine, safe, and secure in the cozy-coin-purse of life one minute, to being suddenly and terrifyingly dropped hard on the floor, rolling to who knows where, and completely LOST in the next.  And sometimes it feels like we aren’t just the coin of a careful, tidy, woman who only drops us once.  No!  All too often this life feels like we’re a coin belonging to Major Shaky McFumblefingers who drops us hard on our heads, over and over and over and over again!

With that in mind, I’d like to propose that in this room… in this “flock” we all just agree to say “I’m LOST” when that’s what we are.  No more “I’m hanging in there” when you’re only hanging on by your fingertips.  No saying you’re “Okay” when you feel painfully alone.  As individuals, there ain’t nobody here who has never been LOST… multiple times… some of us multiple times this week!  Yes, I’m suggesting we face a scary thing… Both being LOST and more so being HONEST about it!  But here’s why I think we can do both.  Because it is BOTH God’s Speciality AND God's Great Joy to find the us when we are lost, scoop us up, bring us home, and throw a universe-thumping party to celebrate!  This Gospel tells us that God is both GOOD at finding the lost… and LOVES doing it!  I think we can brave being honest because getting lost is simply part of being human AND finding the lost is simply part of being The Divine.  It is literally a match made in heaven!   

But, you say, what about when it’s my fault I got lost?  Maybe I wasn’t just dropped by life.  Maybe I wandered off?  THE DIVINE DOES NOT CARE!  Because finding the lost, however they got that way, is the Divine’s Great JOY!  But, you say, I get lost all the time, for the same reason, over and over and over again and never seem to learn my lesson.  Again, I can’t emphasize this enough… THE DIVINE DOESN’T CARE!  Because it is God’s HEAVEN-SIZED, CALL THE ANGELS TO REJOICE, GREAT JOY to find you over and over and over again just as often as you might wander off or as often as life… a.k.a. Major Shaky McFumblefingers drops you on your head (or your tail) like a coin.  How many ever times you get lost… THAT is how many times God will REVEL in the JOY of finding you, bringing you back, and throwing another party!  

In Church-y lingo, we call that Grace, and you and I… EVEN as highly imperfect, perpetually lost, and repeatedly dropped on our heads followers of Jesus… You and I are NOT ONLY called to give thanks for the Grace that finds US over and over and over again… BUT WE ARE ALSO called to make Grace OUR Speciality and OUR Joy as well.  Of course, individually we have absolutely no chance of finding our way out of a paper bag let alone a lost sheep, coin, family member, friend, or neighbor.  Individually we are just as lost as that joker sitting right next to you right now!  Yeah, that one.  

Individually we are indeed nearly perpetually LOST… but together… OH, TOGETHER… we are nothing less than the Body of Christ!  Together, in some mystical way, we are the Good Shepherd with the fully developed specialty of finding the lost, hoisting them on our shoulders, and bringing them home to a party!  Together, in that same mystical way, we are caught up with the Divine in Feminine form, lighting the lamp of unrelenting Grace, expertly searching the darkness, lifting the lost back to life again, and celebrating with the heavenly host!  Individually we are, and can only be, completely and totally lost.  But together… Oh TOGETHER… together, members and friends, both new and old... Together we are nothing less than the Body of Christ, gifted with the power to bring God’s unrelenting Grace to our neighbors... and Grace, it turns out, is exactly what our world most desperately needs right now.  Amen.   

The Discipleship-O-Meter

Luke 14:25-33

Now large crowds were traveling with [Jesus], and he turned and said to them, “Whoever comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and even life itself, cannot be my disciple.  Whoever does not carry the cross and follow me cannot be my disciple.  For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not first sit down and estimate the cost, to see whether he has enough to complete it?  Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it will begin to ridicule him, saying, ‘This fellow began to build and was not able to finish.’  Or what king, going out to wage war against another king, will not sit down first and consider whether he is able with ten thousand to oppose the one who comes against him with twenty thousand?  If he cannot, then while the other is still far away, he sends a delegation and asks for the terms of peace.  So therefore, none of you can become my disciple if you do not give up all your possessions.”

So, today we need to figure out how to be good disciples by hating mom, dad, brothers and sisters… Oh, and don’t forget, hating the kids and spouse too!  But before we get to THAT fun, we first need to remember that in this lesson Jesus is talking about DISCIPLESHIP and not SALVATION… two churchy words that we should not get confused.  SALVATION is going to heaven, getting your mansion in the sky, eating food rich with marrow and well aged wines strained clear at a feast that never ends… all of THAT.  THAT is SALVATION.  SALVATION is a complete and total GIFT from God.  In Christ’s life, death and resurrection we are ALL given SALVATION as a free gift with no take-backsies!  Salvation is God’s Work AND as the song says, “The Strife is O’er, the Battle is Done.”  You’re in!

THIS lesson is about DISCIPLESHIP.  DISCIPLESHIP is the particular Way that we Christians are called to walk through this thing called “life”.  I think what this lesson is trying to tell us (albeit in a super dramatic, confusing way) is that to be a Disciple means to prioritize our walking through this life on what I like to call “The Jesus Way” over all the other possible “ways” we are pushed and pulled to walk through this life… the family way, the friend way, the way of success, the career way, the money way, the way of possessions… just to name a few.  

I DON’T think Luke is using the word “HATE” here to call us to an emotional hatred of our own families.  I also DON’T think Jesus is calling us to a life cut off from all familial relationships, living a hermit’s existence without money or possessions.  What I DO think Luke is doing here is trying to tell us that as we begin to prioritize walking The Jesus Way over all those other ways we are pulled and pushed to walk through this life, it may very well FEEL at first… both to us doing the walking and to those around us… like we have suddenly begun to HATE those who now come behind walking The Jesus Way.  

I think that is what we see from the crowd that was following Jesus.  They had all been following Jesus because, well, he was awesome!  He had fed 5000 people!  He healed folks and cast out demons, he calmed storms and walked on water… People were following Jesus because… WOW!  They all said, “Let’s tag along and see what amazing thing this guy does next?”  But when Jesus turned around, he told that crowd that following him JUST to see the next awesome thing, isn’t Discipleship.  The loaves and fishes might have been free, but REAL discipleship… that costs BIG!!  So how do you even do THAT?  How do you put all those other possible ways to walk through the world behind The Jesus Way? 

I don’t know how YOU do that, but the way I do that is… POORLY… INCOMPLETELY… in fits and starts… and with grand intentions that never quite fully pan out.  That’s how I do discipleship.  Don’t get me wrong.  I FULLY understand what Jesus is asking of me.  It is the same thing he asked of all those people following him, to walk onto God’s Way and put everything, and everyone else, behind that.  I get it… and I really do try… a lot of the time… well, some of the time… I really do try though!  Honest!  But even with all that effort, I think the maximum I have ever hit on the ol’ Discipleship-O-Meter is about 10.3% Disciple… and that was on my most Disciple-y day ever.

Other folks have been known to do better.  Mother Teresa once got to about 89% on the Discipleship-O-Meter, but she also had years and years of doubt and darkness where she was down in single digits.  Saint Peter once got to a 93% for a minute when he said “Jesus, you’re the Messiah” but then just a couple of steps later and he pegged the needle back at zero when he told Jesus “by no means” should he go to Jerusalem.  The point is, nobody ever makes it all the way to 100% on the Discipleship-O-Meter.  Discipleship is a walk that is technically within our reach, because it doesn’t demand MORE than what we have, BUT, since it demands nothing LESS than EVERYTHING we have, we humans, by the nature of simply “being human”… will always fall short.

Still, even though nobody ever gets to 100% discipleship, Jesus, and Luke in his telling of this story, are trying to help us understand that it is STILL, really worth making the walk along The Jesus Way a priority for just as long and as far as we can manage each and every day.  Because as we walk, step by step along The Way; as we strive to love God more completely and love our neighbors more sacrificially… as we live each day doing more justice, loving more kindness and walking more humbly like Jesus did… step by step we will find that we are ACTUALLY living more deeply into the life we have been given… a life that is meant to be full of meaning, purpose, and contentment AND it turns out that the more we are able to prioritize that walk into discipleship itself… the more room that walk makes within our being for the joy filled, abundant life we were all created to live AND the more room that walk makes within our being for mom, dad, brothers and sisters, the kids and yes, even for the spouse!  Amen.