Invite it on the Bus!

The Holy Gospel According to St. Matthew, the 17th Chapter

Six days later, Jesus took with him Peter and James and his brother John and led them up a high mountain, by themselves. And he was transfigured before them, and his face shone like the sun, and his clothes became dazzling white. Suddenly there appeared to them Moses and Elijah, talking with him. Then Peter said to Jesus, “Lord, it is good for us to be here; if you wish, I will make three dwellings here, one for you, one for Moses, and one for Elijah.” 

While he was still speaking, suddenly a bright cloud overshadowed them, and from the cloud a voice said, “This is my Son, the Beloved; with him I am well pleased; listen to him!” When the disciples heard this, they fell to the ground and were overcome by fear. But Jesus came and touched them, saying, “Get up and do not be afraid.” And when they looked up, they saw no one except Jesus himself alone. As they were coming down the mountain, Jesus ordered them, “Tell no one about the vision until after the Son of Man has been raised from the dead.”

Six days later, my wife took with her, our dog and me and led us to our long kitchen table.  I knew this was bad.  The dog didn’t care.  There, she became super serious looking so before she said anything I said, “Hey, it’s good you brought us here to the kitchen table, because with all this snow coming we’re going to need to just stay right here, hunker down and not go anywhere and I think chili would be good for dinner.”  And while I was still yammering, a voice from heaven said, “Erik, this is your beloved, she is really QUITE a bit smarter than you.  Shut up and listen to her.”  When I heard this I was overcome with fear.  The dog still didn’t care.  He’s sort of a jerk that way.  But then my wife touched me and said, “Get up.  Don’t be afraid.  Go and get new tires… TODAY.”  

Six days-ish before that I had come to Augusta for Everyday Basics and when I left to come home, I started down the big hill on Winthrop Street toward the river.  The road was covered in that thick, not quite slush but not quite snow, sort of snotty, winter mess and as I applied the brakes, my tires slipped and the anti-lock brakes, anti-locked, and still I slid almost all the way down the hill.  The good news was I stopped before I slid into River Street or the river.  The bad news was that I needed new tires and the thought of new tires gave me great fear.  

Now, I don’t have some bizarre new-tire phobia.  What I fear is spending money… almost always, but particularly with two kids in college.  I wanted to take a couple of months to squirrel the money away and pay with cash.  But then the pre-blizzard came, which was to be followed by the REAL blizzard  which was going to be followed by the post-blizzard, and Kelly said, “I know you fear putting tires on the credit card.  I know spending $500 on tires will feel like death to you and I know your fear won’t magically go away if I tell you not to fear.  So invite your fear to come with you to the tire place and the two of you get new tires on your car TODAY... because new tires mean life.”  So, my fear and I got into my car and we went and got new tires, because God's right… she's QUITE a bit smarter than I am.  

The thing that happened six days before today’s Gospel lesson is that Jesus told the disciples he needed to go to Jerusalem, where he would suffer and die and be raised from the dead which is ALMOST as bad as me having to get new tires.  The disciples were well aquatinted with the suffering and death part… THAT was a part of everyone’s regular world, but the being raised from the dead part seemed pretty far fetched, so they, very understandably, had a real fear of going to Jerusalem.  But in the middle of the disciple’s yammering, God spoke and said, “Disciples listen, this is Jesus, my beloved, he is QUITE a bit smarter than you, shut up and listen to him” and then, Jesus touched them, they got up, loaded their fear on the bus and went down the mountain and on to Jerusalem anyway.  Because even though the disciples couldn’t wrap their minds around it, and even though they were still scared by it, somehow the death and resurrection that would happen in Jerusalem, they believed, was the path to abundant life.  

Here’s the thing about these stories that’s really important… Kelly telling me not to be afraid didn’t magically take away my fear.  Jesus telling the disciples not to be afraid didn’t magically take away their fear either, but faithfulness is not fearlessness.  Faithfulness is seeing your fear and maybe even grousing, complaining and fidgeting about it but eventually... even if it’s begrudgingly... accepting it and inviting your fear onto the bus with you and driving on down the mountain toward the promise of new life even with that fear in tow anyway.  

As humans, those yucky, sticky, feelings like fear and anxiety and exhaustion and worry and indifference and all the rest, don’t ever magically get zapped away.  So if we wait to be fearless BEFORE we make a step toward the things and people whom God has placed in our lives to help us experience the Abundant Life God created us to live, we'll never even take the first step toward living in God's gift of abundant life.  

The answer, Jesus showed the disciples, is NOT to wait for the day you become fearless.  The answer is to acknowledge the yucky, sticky spots of fear... stand up and invite those sticky, yucky fears to come along with you and Jesus as you take a step toward LIFE.  The answer is not to wait for fearlessness but to take a step in faithfulness... even just one tiny step, then another and another and another… on down the mountain and out into the world, one tiny, even seemingly insignificant little step toward loving God and loving neighbor... one step after another, toward LIFE.

It's a good answer, but easy to forget.  There is a handy way to remember it, though.  Because, you see, we LIVE OUT this lesson every single Sunday.  Every Sunday we start like the disciples, confessing our fears, confessing that we would rather build a booth, dig in where we are, not change, not go down the mountain or go out into the world where life is even scarier, stickier and yuckier.  And every week God tells us, “Yeah, I know. I love you anyway.”  

Then God says, “NOW listen to Jesus, he’s quite a bit smarter than you” and we listen to stories about Jesus being quite a bit smarter than we are.  We then come to Jesus's Table and Jesus touches us… literally touches us… as the host is placed in our hand, Jesus touches us and tells us to stand up... He tells us that, “The Body and Blood of our Lord Jesus Christ, strengthens you and keeps you always in his grace” and then together, you and me, along with Jesus... we take all of our fears, anxieties, worries and all the rest of life’s sticky, yucky stuff and with Jesus, we load it all on the bus and head down the mountain, moving as best we can toward ABUNDANT LIFE.  One tiny step after another.  First out that door (and then we get a snack) and then out the other door into the parking lot and then out into the world… not fearlessly, but faithfully, always doing our best to move toward LIFE.  

Jesus said, "I came that they may have life and have it abundantly."  That's why we're here, week after week... to receive abundant life again... to live this story again... to be touched by Jesus again... to have Jesus stand us up again... to be strengthened again... to invite all that we fear to join us on the bus again... to love God and neighbor again... to drive down the mountain on the Way again... even through death again... but always toward LIFE again.  Let us all step toward LIFE again.  Amen.